One question that I get asked frequently is: “when do we tell our child their adoption story”? I recommend beginning to tell the story while the baby is still in the crib (for an infant adoption). While the baby will not understand you for quite some time, by starting to tell the story now, you will become comfortable with the story by the time the baby can understand you. Practice makes perfect. You do not want to appear hesitant or anxious in telling the story once the child is old enough to understand. Children have great emotional radar and will pick up on your anxiety. This may lead to the child not being comfortable asking questions about the adoption.
Keep the story as postive, yet at truthful, as possible. Negative facts about the birthparents or the adoption need not be part of the story. Keep it fairly simple. And be open to questions as they arise.
There are great products available that help with telling your child’s adoption story. Some can be customized to your particular situation, such as www.mycreationsbooks.com .
Filed under: Parenting an Adopted Child, Post-Placement by Tamara
The irrevocable moment in which you become a parent is not the moment you conceive a child; it’s the moment you conceive of her~Barbara Jones
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources by Tamara
Adoptive Families Magazine has started a blog…www.adoptivefamiliescircle.com. You can never have too many resources for support!
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources by Tamara
I recently came across some websites that I found useful and thought I would share: www.zerotothree.org; and www.uwex.edu/ces/flp/pp. both provide good information about zero to three and preschoolers. The Univ of Wisconsin site provides pdfs that can be downloaded thru their Family Living Program-Parenting the Preschooler
Filed under: Uncategorized by Tamara
This cute book introduces adoption and birthmothers in a non-threatening way. There is a religious tone to it so some may not be comfortable but the story of the kangaroo with the empty pouch can be very moving. I present this book as a gift to adoptive parents when they bring their baby home.
A Blessing from Above (Little Golden Book)
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources, General by Tamara
This book is good for explaining adoption to young children. It comes in a male and a female version, but only the male version is currently available on Amazon. The story begins with a Star in heaven and ends with a little one in the arms of his/her parents. I have this one for my son.
A Star Named Little One (male version)
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources by Tamara
This is an excellent resource for those interested in starting the adoption process. The first half of the book explains types of adoptions, homestudies, etc and the second half of the book is broken down by state and lists info about aspects of the law and agencies in that state making it a good place to start. The Complete Adoption Book-3rd Edition-by Laura Beauvais-Godwin & Raymond Godwin, Esq.
The Complete Adoption Book: Everything You Need to Know to Adopt a Child
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources by Tamara
At the beginning of course…
Before you move any further into the adoption adventure, it is best to stop, think and be sure that you are looking into adoption for the right reasons. A child who joins your family through adoption cannot be a replacement for a child you were unable to give birth to. So… whether you have been unable to become pregnant, unable to carry the pregnancy to term, whether you pursued infertility treatments or not, you must be sure that you have addressed and greived these losses. Adoption is an emotional process as it is so there is no sense carrying extra baggage into the process. Once the grief and loss issues have been addressed and worked through then you can begin, and hopefully enjoy, the wonderful adventure that is the adoption process.
Filed under: Where to Begin by Tamara
I have found another photobook/scrapbooking resource. Emma is a STL mom who has developed “unique photo books’, “snappy little board books that instantly turn 10 snapshots into an adventure, a party or a keepsake”. I recommend you check out Baby Face
www.snapstories.com
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources, Uncategorized by Tamara
www.nelleandlizzy.com. I recommend the mother’s ring that can be customized with the birthstone and name of the child!! Great gift idea for the new mom.
Filed under: Articles, Books and Resources, Uncategorized by Tamara
